


Stealthy Kisses

by JHsgf82



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23074930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JHsgf82/pseuds/JHsgf82
Summary: Peeta reflects upon his insecurities and his relationship with Katniss, post-war.  Response to drabble prompt: Why do you only kiss me when I'm sleeping?
Relationships: Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark
Comments: 12
Kudos: 121





	Stealthy Kisses

It’s nearly three in the morning, and I’m in Katniss’s home in Victor’s Village, a place that is practically my home now, too. I have my qualms about being here, of course, and that’s why I’m pacing the floors at this hour, but things have improved a lot. I’ve graduated to monthly follow-ups with Dr. Aurelius by phone, and he thinks I’ve come a long way, but the truth of the matter is, I’ll always be a threat. What if I relapse and hurt Katniss? I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. But I can’t leave her alone with only Haymitch next door, so I’ll be here as long as she wants me to be. 

Since my return to District 12 after the war, Katniss and I have both just been focusing on healing, alongside each other. We haven’t had the energy to think of anything else. Eventually, we learned to keep busy. I bake. She hunts. We started growing back together about a month ago, and things are better than I imagined they could be after two Hunger Games, my imprisonment and hijacking in the Capitol, the destruction of our home, the loss of beloved family members and friends, and a war. 

I suppose I live with Katniss now, but I don’t really know what we are. How can I define our relationship? I go through the list of words I associate with her in my head: Friend, Lover, Victor, Fianćee, Enemy, Target, Mutt, Ally… I’ve tried to permanently stamp out the ‘Enemy’ and ‘Mutt’ in my head, but they’re forever there because, at one time, she was those things to me. I add a new word to the list, roommate. But maybe it’s more than that…I don’t know. I add ‘companion.’ 

I’m restless tonight, but Katniss was sleeping soundly when I snuck out of bed, and it’s so rare she gets even a few good hours of uninterrupted sleep in that I try to be as quiet as possible when I take the stairs‒I skip the second-to-last one that squeaks. I pass her‒our?‒bedroom for the third time and catch her whimpering, so I slip past the partially opened door and tiptoe to her bedside.

I look down upon her; there’s a bit of sweat on her brow, and she’s muttering something unintelligible, but at least she’s not thrashing around. I wait a moment, considering whether or not to wake her. She finally stills, and I find a handkerchief and gently dab at her forehead. Fortunately, she doesn’t wake, and I continue standing guard over her. 

The urge to kiss her bubbles up in my chest. I’ve felt it before, so many times, and I’ve indulged the whim more times than I can count, but I’ve held back even more. And I’m tired of it. But I’ll wait until Katniss is ready, if she ever is. 

I’ve watched her sleeping on other nights like this, and I admit I’ve taken some liberties… 

So far, I’ve only kissed her cheek or hand or forehead. And I always do it as softly as possible, barely touching her skin so as not to wake her. Part of me just wants to give her comfort with my lips, but there’s another part…the part that despite all we’ve been through is still just a guy madly in love who wants to kiss his girl anytime he feels like it. I feel like a coward, a pitiful thief plundering kisses in the night from the girl of his dreams. 

What would Katniss say if she knew? Would she yell at me? Would she kick me out? 

Even so…I want to kiss her. I need to kiss her. Now. I can’t wait any longer. 

So, I place my hand as steadily as possible against the bed on the other side of her body, and I lean closer. My heart is pounding in my ears, and I can’t help thinking how dangerous this is. It wouldn’t do, at all, for her to find me hovering over her in her sleep. She’d be afraid. But I can’t resist. Now I know how that prince from the story felt. 

Eyes trained on her face, I suck in a breath and close the remaining distance between us, and I touch my lips ever so softly to hers. They’re dry but just as nice as I remember. Katniss’s lips have had many different tastes, I recall, sometimes sweet and slick with Capitol gloss, other times salty from tears, and sometimes she tastes like the food she’s just eaten. This time, though, she just tastes like her, and that’s perfect for me. My lips linger on hers, and I want so badly to press harder, explore deeper, but I restrain myself.

When Katniss stirs, I break contact immediately. I hold my breath and take a very large step back. She shifts in her sleep once more, and then I catch the glint of silver in the moonlight. 

“Hey,” she rasps, not sounding angry, only groggy. 

The effect of her sleepy voice on me is palpable. I swallow the lump in my throat. “Heyy,” I drawl back. “Sorry to wake you.” 

“You’re up,” she comments. 

“Yeah.” 

“Nightmare?” I catch a hint of concern in her voice. 

I shake my head. “No, just couldn’t sleep, so I was walking around. Then I heard you. Did you have one?” 

She shakes her head as if she doesn’t remember and pulls back the covers, exposing my abandoned spot. I know she expects me to crawl in like usual, so I do. I nestle in and turn to face her, one arm going instinctively behind my head while the other tucks around her waist. We stare at one another a moment before I chance tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. 

What she says next is unexpected. 

“Why do you only kiss me when I’m sleeping?” she asks. 

My lips part. I shouldn’t be surprised she knew. Katniss is stealthy, and I’m the opposite of that. I wonder how many she’s let go. 

“Uh…” I fidget, twisting the fabric of her nightgown between my fingers, and as her words register, my heart does somersaults. On one hand, I’ve been caught stealing kisses, but on the other, she sounds like she might want them… 

When Katniss’s lip curls slightly, I take comfort in knowing she’s not upset with me. We don’t speak further. 

It doesn’t take long for us to lean into each other, our foreheads brushing, then our noses. I’m not sure who makes contact first, but we lock lips, softly, teasingly. From there, it builds, and that unmistakable feeling only Katniss gives me grows, spreading throughout my body like wildfire. I pull her closer, and our kisses persist. My hands are burning, hardly knowing where to go but wanting to be everywhere. I settle for one in her hair while the other roams her back, caressing, gripping, and occasionally squeezing. 

After some time, I break apart long enough to ask her the question that’s been weighing on me. “You love me. Real or not real?” 

She hesitates only a second or two before answering, “Real.” 

And we pick up where we left off… 

I don’t know how far she’ll let me take things tonight; I’ll leave it up to her. But for now, I’m more than content. This moment goes beyond my wildest expectations, and I can only hope it’s the beginning of many more such nights.


End file.
